Things that make you say "What?"

Alright so another tale from the bizarro world that I call my own. I was looking for a packing list online that would suit my needs for this weekends jaunt to New York. I am mildly impaired when it comes to packing. I always forget things that are necessity aka shampoo, deodorant, shoes (okay not shoes.) I opt to pack the latter as opposed to the former for days where I want to do my best Mary Kate Olsen impression. If I show up looking like this, Keeley I give you permission to shoot me and make it look like an accident. The odd part of this story isn't that I forget shampoo, it is some of the items that showed up on the list of things I should pack. (Mind you I specified weather, location, and form of travel [air] etc.)
1. Sarong...70 degrees and under, where am I wearing a sarong to?
2. Palestinian scarf...what?
3. Morning gown, I don't even know what that is.
4. small box, again what?
5. Mosquito net...is something going on in New York that I don't know about?
6. Pepper Spray Canister, on vacation? Seriously?
7. Two way radios...breaker breaker 136 there is a bandit list writer on the loose.
Maybe by airplane they thought I meant 18-wheeler.
8. rubber door stop...good maybe I will finally be able to keep all those doors open
9. timestables, just in case I begin thinking 2 x 2 = 392. Right, okay I get this
one. timestables, check.

A side note, they also said I should memorize all my credit card #'s, and find hospitals in the area that take my insurance.

Okay admit it whose grandma wrote this list? Honestly. Sarah is that British grandma of yours telling me a morning gown, and
a small box are necessary? She's really lost it this time.