My name is Domino Harvey and I am a bounty hunter.
My roommate Erin and I are notorious for going to absolutely horrible movies together. On at least 3 or 4 occasions we have found ourselves in a movie theater laughing hysterically because whatever is on the screen is simply ridiculous. Last night's extravaganza "Domino" proved to have many pee your pants moments (that weren't meant to be funny.)
Exhibit A: It took me 15 minutes to get used to the idea that Kiera Knightley was a bounty hunter. There is no way I could hunt for bounty in pants that left about an inch and a half of my butt crack hanging out, she did it though, well done Kiera.
Exhibit B: Anytime they were driving anywhere, doing pretty much anything that wasn't talking a song came on that was basically mumbley rap until they got to the chorus which was simply "Motherf-er" yelled really really loudly.
Exhibit C: The incredibly awkward lap dances, strippers, and sex scene in the desert after they had been drugged and survived a really bad Winnebago accident. Yeah that's right Winnebago accident.
Exhibit D: Brian Austin Green and Ian Ziering were a part of the cast. Still can't figure this one out.
After all of that it was still entertaining. Although I told some people I would practice my karate kicks in the aisle, some guy sat next to me at the last minute and ruined my whole plan to make Domino interactive. I think Erin bribed him to sit there so I couldn't get out. A plague on your house. Crap, no plague, strike the plague, that's my house too. Strike it, we've worked with Corky before.
The higher notes:
It did give me the inclination to walk in slow motion with bullets strapped around my torso.
You will never hear me say "My name is Tiffany Matalone and I am a bounty hunter." At least not for real. I have been turned off by that profession.
It was free.
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4 comments:
yeah right you're not going to call yourself a bounty hunter. don't pretend like you weren't kicking and doing judo chops around the living room and saying the f word for the rest of the night either. seriously though, you were judo chopping a lot, and as far as i'm concerned you and domino are a lot like getting locked in the trunk of a car, you find people.
seems to me like all that movie needed was tiffany amber theissen and they could have called it "90210".
Hey buddy,
I read it. Your blog. I read it. And yes it was awkward (the movie not reading your blog), but I would not have wanted to be awkward around anyone else but you. Isn't that sweet?:)
HOO RAH.
that little nonsense word was left to clue you into the next possible awkward movie moment to come. Jake Gillanhall and you and me.
Jesus walks. God show me the way cuz the devil tryin to break me down.
Can Jamie Foxx come too?
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